Trumped

I was going to write a post about some literary term, but I woke up to some morning news so scarily laughable I have to post about it again.

Donald Trump is planning to announce his bid for the Presidency today....again.

Now, I don't know Mr. Trump, so I can't make any claims against him as a person, because as we all know, the media isn't exactly known for accuracy.

We can, however, use some facts to paint a fairly reliable picture of his qualifications to be the leader of our country.

Let's take Leslie Knope's (from Parks and Recreation) favorite way of making a decision--the pros and cons list.

Okay, so let's talk about Mr. Trump.

PRO: His mother is Scottish. I am of Scottish descent.

CON: He has Scottish blood, and we all know what that means. (forgive my stereotyping, but remember, I'm Scottish, so I'm making fun of myself. However, let it be known that if you stole my bike, I would NOT kill you.)

Donald Trump may have traveled to Scotland just to put up this sign.

PRO: Donald Trump knows how to make money. He's a shrewd business man. He's worth about 9 billion dollars.

CON: Donald Trump knows how to lose money, declaring business bankruptcy at least four times and coming close to personal bankruptcy several times as well.

PRO: Donald Trump is not a politician.

CON: Donald Trump is not anything but a business man, one who would rather kill a country and "take their oil" rather than live in peace. Becoming rich at the expense of lives and without regard for humanity is one of the most awful things ever.

PRO: Donald Trump is diverse. He's everywhere. We have Trump Towers, Trump Model Management, Trump Shuttle, Trump International Golf, Trump Pro Wrestling, Trump Books, Trump Ice, Trump Mortgage, Trump This, Trump That, etc...

CON: Donald Trump is a narcissist.

Ambiguity in politics. I have to love this. Bragging about beating a girl is not nice. And I don't know, maybe it would be fun to watch them duke it out (that was NOT a political endorsement for Hillary Clinton).

PRO: Donald Trump is an open book. What you see is what you get. Although opinionated, probably racist, and a womanizer, at least he doesn't hide it.

CON: Donald Trump is an opinionated, racist, womanizer.

Donald Trump OWNS The Miss Universe Pageant.

PRO: Donald Trump fires people. A lot of people in government desperately need to be fired.
CON: Donald Trump would probably fire the wrong people.

PRO: Donald Trump supported Ronald Reagan early on.
CON: Donald Trump supported Mitt Romney.

CON: Donald Trump knows nothing about public service. Money is not the measure of a man's character. Money and fame and a big mouth don't equate to intelligence (as Forrest might say).

PRO: We don't have to worry about Donald Trump running for President. He's a broken record, beginning in 1988 and following his theme of attempting to grab the spotlight in 2000, 2004, and 2012.

So, I guess this was a pointless political post. GO, JEB!